Last week I finally pulled the plug on my Facebook account. I had been debating it for a long time and had written more posts on Facebook than people probably desired to read! But it was something that was always on my mind:
A Vision for Technology
Facebook
Simplifying for a Season
As I read back over these posts, I saw a lot of what I struggled with earlier came to be the reason I finally shut down my Facebook. So why did I shut it down? Here are my reasons:
** Quick disclaimer: I am in no way saying everyone must shut down Facebook. I think it can be a really good tool for people, but it just wasn’t working for me anymore.
1. Time waster: As hard as I tried not to waste time on Facebook, it was such a huge draw. I think some people are much more self-controlled when it comes to the internet. It is certainly a weakness for me. Facebook is obviously not the issue, my own heart is, but I felt like I had enough fronts in my life to fight against wasting time that it would be beneficial to eliminate one of those fronts.
2. Duped into believing I was feeding relationships: I often used the excuse that Facebook helped me to keep in touch with others, and in some ways it did. But the past few months I was seeing that it made me think I was up on someone’s life (which I often was), but there was no concrete, edifying communication going on. My two closest friends are not on Facebook, so I know that Facebook is in no way required to have a vibrant relationship with someone. I felt like I had a lot of touches with a lot of people, but that without Facebook I could concentrate more time into deeper communication with fewer people.
3. Often made me frustrated with people: I was in no way a perfect Facebook user, so please don’t hear that. I did my best as a Christian to use it to build up and edify others, but I know I often fell short on that. I could easily fall into complaining, pride and sin in other areas. But I was having a really hard time when I saw those habitual patterns in other Christians. It got tiring to see and really changed my view of a lot of people. And I really didn’t want my view of someone to be based upon their Facebook wall.
So those were some of the main reasons I decided to end my Facebook era 
I was wondering if I was doing the right thing at times in the shutdown process, but when I woke up the next morning with a big sigh of relief, I knew it was the right call for me. I am thankful for the many relationships that have flourished on Facebook and am confident they will continue without Facebook. Already I have seen that my time is better spent at home with the kids and for that, it was well worth it!
I’m glad you are at peace with “the book” and leaving. I still go back and forth every other day about staying or going. I’m thinking the app has to go again. Deleting it really helped me. also, when I deleted all of my family, that really helped me too, so maybe they need to go again. It forced us to skype and call instead of just checking FB all the time!
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Facebook and I have a love/hate relationship as well. One day I don’t mind it, love reading positive status updates, etc. The next day someone on my wall is complaining about laundry. Really? Anyways, I wanted to know how it would’ve been different for you if you really limited your amount of friends, instead of accepting tons of friend request?
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Yes, I thought about that as well, but I did cut my friend in list in half (from 600 to 300) and after that was not sure how to cut it down anymore without offending people. It was esp. hard when other basketball wives requested me b/c although I didn’t know them I felt like I should accept. Just not having to deal with friend requests has lightened my burden! LOL!
I don’t know if I could ever get rid of FB. I enjoy seeing posts from my family and friends. But I agree that it can get difficult when you attempt to cut people from your list as I’ve tried to do that on several occasions. But somehow even people I don’t correspond with a lot still make the cut when it comes to my rule of “you are only my FB friend if I would actually stop and talk to you in ‘real’ life!”
One of my biggest pet-peeves about FB is that I feel that so many people use it as a platform to say “look how great my life is” or “I have this or am doing this” etc. etc. It seems that it’s turned narcissistic and people over-indulge with their status updates. Of course I am guilty of this too at times, but I do get the feeling that certain users are all about “me, me, me.” I also can get conflicted with posts as a lot of a person’s intonations can be lost in a message or comment and comes out the wrong way either on purpose or not. I feel that I’ve noticed that a lot on the L&BB group and that saddens me too.
Anyway…just my 2 cents!
You reminded me of another point I meant to make, Erica. The point of the narcissism I was seeing in my own heart. I saw it especially once I stopped Facebook and I would be thinking, “I should post that!” Sad really
I just thought of another thing about FB that bothers me. I really only use it when I’m overseas. It serves as a need for conversing with others (especially when Phil is on a road trip). It basically fills the void of being lonely. Sad but true.
Thanks for sharing, Erin. I can understand your reasons behind giving it up, although I do miss seeing your posts! However, I’m guessing that you’re already utilizing that “extra” time quite efficiently.
Thanks, Suzanne. I will still be following your blog